Love...At First Sight

I've spent this entire Summer thinking about Sean. Wishing I could see him again, wishing he was mine. Just wishing I could go back and make things between us happen.

So far one month of Summer Break is up and not one week has passed when I haven't thought to myself "I want him to be mine."

It's pathetic, yes. It's sad, I know.

The chances of anything ever happening between us is so slim. Maybe he's just not interested anymore.

Is it so wrong that I want to be with him? I've never felt like this. Ever.

If only...

He is seriously my dream guy (minus a few things of course). I've said it before, but I'll gladly say it again. He's sweet, funny, nice and outgoing. He's incredibly attractive with an amazing smile and outstanding body. He makes me feel confident and pretty. Probably 85% of the times we've seen each other have been times when I'm sweaty or makeup free and he treats me the same and I feel the same.

It seems so simple with him. He knows how to treat a girl. He's honest and he's so respectful. The only type of guy I'd ever want to be with. I'm just so sure that he doesn't feel the same way that it kills me.

I don't want to get ahead of myself, I'm only 15 after all, but...maybe it really was love at first sight with Sean. I don't believe in it but how else can I explain this?

I mean, did that bus ride conversation end there? Is that as far as it's going to go?

Because it's a shame if it is.

My New Years Resolutions

My second one:

Be more confident in myself.

There is always that voice telling me "You're beautiful."

But then there is always that voice telling me I'm not.

I actually never had a problem with this until last summer when I went to Wisconsin for a track meet and a few of the guys thought it would be fun to yell nasty things at me. 

That completely thrashed my self-esteem for a while. I wore more makeup, I perfected my hair where ever I went and I even started to dress more provocatively. 

After finding myself, and watching a few episodes of The Tyra Show (laughs),  my confidence was incredibly boosted.

But my New Years Resolution will be to stay confident and to believe in myself more.

I am beautiful, everyone is,  and it's time I start seeing that.

Besides, being insecure is too much work.

Summer Obsession

My last summer obsession is the song "Love The Way You Lie". I am obsessed! I love the music video, the meaning of the lyrics, and Rihanna's voice. I also love that Eminem is rapping about life and not "lil mamas gettin crunk". This is an amazing song by Eminem feat. Rihanna. I've been singing it all around school this week!

To see all my other summer obsession posts click here.

Summer Obsession

I could go on and on about why he's my obsession...
His smile is gorgeous, his voice is hot, his eyebrows are beautiful!
His body...makes me want to melt. I could spend hours staring at his perfectly-sculpted abs, and his huge biceps.
If you watch Criminal Minds. Derrick Morgan, his character, is so funny, manly, powerful, and just plain sexy!
He may be 40, but that doesn't stop me! I'll be fantasizing about him even when he's 50...

Summer Obsession

I am IN LOVE with high waisted mini skirts! They come in such a huge color, shape, pattern, texture, and length variety. My favorites are the floral print ones. I own five of these skirts...three of which are floral print. They're so easy to dress up or dress down and they are so cute and flirty! The really good thing about them is that they can be found almost anywhere; Forever21, Ross, TopShop, Wetseal, Jcpenney, American Eagle, even Wal-Mart! I recommend every girl owning one of these skirts, as they are a staple piece in your closet. Fall will start soon, but Ill be swooping up the sales racks of all these skirts!

Summer Obsession

My favorite type of bikini; Bandeau. Flattering and cute.
Bikinis like this, give me so much confidence!
No matter what kind of a day I'm having.

Summer Obsession

Lately, Ive been in love with Skinny Cow.
Ive been trying to eat healthy for a while and since I finished track, it's been hard.

Yesterday I went out grocery shopping and I got a TON of healthy-ish food.
Including Skinny Cow Strawberry Shortcake Ice Cream Sandwiches. Only 150 calories and it's low fat!
Perfect for the hot weather of summer. It is currently 92 degrees, thank God it's cloudy outside.

All I ask for, is that you care.

A little girl needs our help. If not to donate, then to at least hear her story. Share it. While we are out enjoying our summer, being at the beach and getting tan, she'll be laying on a hospital bed, waiting for the good news that seems to never come. So please, just hear her story. Go to the site below for more.

Click to support

Eva

As promised, in my "Summer" post, I have to tell you about Eva*, and our friendship.

We met in 4th grade. It was about 2 weeks into the school year when she came along.
I didn't really like her, in fact, I hated her. And one day I gave her an invitation to a party that I was having and she literally handed back the invitation and said she didn't want to go. You can imagine that I hated her much more after that.
Then 5th grade came along. We discovered that we lived in the same neighborhood, she lived just down the street!
I went over her house almost everyday that summer.
That's how we became best friends.
All through out middle school we had our ups and downs.
6th grade we didn't talk for a whole month. That's a while for best friends.
7th grade we grew so close, we even went to the beach together.
8th grade...Eva did some things. Everyone called her a whore, and she chose a guy over our friendship. It wasn't til' the last 2 months of school when she stopped her unclassy behavior and we became friends again.
9th grade was an amazing year for our friendship. We got along great and did everything together.
Now, more mature and more prepared, we are closer than ever and I love her!

*Her real name isn't Eva, but I don't want to put her real name on here.

Finally free!

Yesterday was the last day of school!

I feel so free, I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. Well not really, I'm not old enough for that yet. Hah.
Anyway, my plans for the summer already include hanging out with 7 of my closest friends. I love them.
The last day of school was exciting! I got on the bus to go home and literally had a grin on my face. Everyone seemed to be sad, but I'm not too sad, I'll still see my friends.

As for exams, I took the Language exam but I have no idea what my grade was. I made a 93 in Math, an 81 in Social Studies, and a 78 in Science. Overall, Im pretty proud of myself.

Goodbye school. Hello Summer!

3 days.

Only three days left until school is out.
I cannot begin to tell you how excited I am!

So today we had Science exams. I made a 78! What is this?
I studied and everything. I thought I was doing good!
Also today we got our yearbooks!
I got a ton of people to sign I even reserved some pages for some of my close friends to sign. God, I love them.
I got a lot of: "you're amazing and beautiful"s
That kind of stuff is what makes me love people. <3
Anyway, tomorrow we have math exams.
Ugh, hate exams. Well, who doesn't really?

Summer

For sure there has to be a topic about summer.
And before I begin, aren't you so proud of me? I updated twice in one day!

This summer has to be amazing. To accomplish that goal I have to go to the beach with my best friend, Eva. I'll have to do a whole other post about her and our friendship over the years. Anyway, we went to the beach last summer and had a horrible time!
So this summer we plan on redoing that and having the time of our lives! It'll be fun.
Chilling at the pool, laying out by the ocean, meeting guys who are all types of hot.
Eating the best food, staying up till we get bags under our eyes, sneaking out every night, just to giggle and get that rush of adrenaline for doing something so fun!
When we go, I'll take pictures of the condo, beach, us in our cute bikinis, and anything else imaginable.
I'll post some too.
We can talk more about this when Eva and I have it more planned out.
Cant wait!
Summer 2010 will be amazing.