Q&A Time!

photo credit: roma.theoffside.com

How do you handle criticism?
When it's bad...I simply ignore it. I'm not sure whether or not that is a good thing but it's what I do.
I'm one of those people that can be very strong and brave but I have a clear limit and sometimes things I hear or see can push that limit. When I get in that situation, I completely block it out and pretend the hate around me is not there.
That way I can't get hurt.

Who had or has had the greatest impact on your life?
Probably God. I know that sounds cheesy, but I'm serious. I've always been a Christian but I have never really gotten into my religion. When times got really hard and I had no one to go to, I went to God. I do not think my life would be as good as it is now if he wasn't with me.

If you had a friend that spoke to you the way YOU speak to yourself – would you keep them as a friend and for how long?
Yes. I'm very positive to myself. I refuse to be one of those girls who complain about their bodies or put themselves down just because they aren't doing or looking their best that day. No one can be perfect and I accept that. I try to encourage myself as much as possible and even if something went horribly wrong, I force myself to see the good in it.
If I had a friend like that, I'd keep them in my life for as long as I possibly could.


Do you think crying is a form of weakness or a form of strength?
It's a form of strength for sure! I consider it a weakness if you bottle up your feelings and think you can continue to live with that unhappiness. Crying relieves the pain you have inside and it takes a lot of bravery to sit there and cry it all out. I admire the people who aren't afraid of themselves and see no reason to call it a weakness.

A New Perspective

I'm beginning to see a new light to abstinence and having sex before marriage.

I'm not sure if I want to be abstinence for religious (I'm Catholic) or moral reasons.
Maybe I need that security of being with someone who is in a committed relationship since I don't want another guy to leave my life (my father), or maybe it's because I'm secretly afraid of being alone or rejected.

But then I think about how religious I am and I can't bear the thought of losing my virginity without being married first. It just doesn't feel right.

Is it selfish to ask the man I love to wait for me? To marry me if he ever wants to have sex?
Is it wrong to deny my feelings and wants by putting marriage in the way? What if we get a divorce? What if sexually, we aren't compatible but we're already married to each other?

Some people do not get married until they are in their 30's, 40's even 50's. And some people don't get married at all. I don't want to be a 40 year old virgin.

For the most part, I still want to wait. I really, really do. But then again I can't have sex without someone else and what if the man I love disagrees with my decision of abstinence?

I've been thinking about this for months and with all the pressure of sex at school (3 of my friends are already getting into it)...I just don't know.

Thoughts #6- Sex, No Big Deal?

You always hear "when did teenagers start having sex"?

But I'm wondering when did sex become so meaningless?

Don't people want to have sex with the person they love? Doesn't anyone want to feel passion and romance towards the person they are with?

Image: Michal Marcol/FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

I feel like society, TV, movies and just regular people like you and me make sex seem like something everyone should just do for the fun of it.

As you all should know by now, I am a virgin. And a proud one at that.
I have no idea what sex is like, but I don't feel like I need to find some random guy and just "get it over with". As my best friend, Eva, has proved, that is not the way to go.

Image: photostock/FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

I want to have that connection with a guy, I want to feel closer to him.

I feel like sex brings a lot of powerful emotional feelings and if not with the right person, those feelings can be very confusing and ruin a relationship.
Which is why I never understand the people who have meaningless sex with any random person.
Do they not feel those feelings? Do they not care that they are missing out?

Image: Ambro/FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

Again, as you all should know, I'm abstinent.
I'm a very religious Christian and not only does it go against my faith, but it goes against my morals to have sex before marriage and especially with someone I am not in love with.

When I have sex for the first time, it will be with someone I love, someone I can't live without, someone I can trust...someone I can call my husband. And it will be amazing, because I want to look at my husband after my first time and say "I waited for you".

Thoughts #1- Sex

I realize I haven't posted anything interesting for a while, so I'm starting a new segment where I just ramble on about anything random. So here is the first one:

So my best friend Eva had sex. She isn't married, in fact, she probably isn't even in love. She says she is, but she doesn't know what love is.
With me being abstinent and all, hearing about her first time, before marriage makes me want to throw up. It disgusts me how little self respect and confidence she must have.
Anyway, she told me what happened that Friday night:

photo credit

Her boyfriend, let's just call him Jackass. Jackass went over to Eva's house and they watched TV, ate pizza, you know, the usual. Then Eva decided she was "ready" (ready my ass!). She turned the music loud, so no one heard, and they had sex...
She told me she didn't like it and that she felt uncomfortable and wanted to stop. So she made it clear to Jackass that she wanted to stop. He yelled at her, told her he wanted to keep going and she began to cry. He then stopped and tried to comfort her, but she continued to cry.

 Why would you be yelling at your girlfriend when she is handing you her virginity?! She later told me that she doesn't want to and wont do it again, and that she regrets it. But I know she will do it again, and probably soon.
That's just who she is now.

But if she had listened to the one billion times I told her to wait, she probably would have enjoyed her first time having sex. Rather than the 2 minutes with Jackass rubbing inside her.

Stupid Eva and Jackass...what's worse is that I don't feel bad for her at all. As a "true" Christian, she should have felt the need to wait. And he should have supported her.

P.S. Today is exactly one month after my birthday!

10 Random Facts About Me

I am a very religious Christian.


Ive lived in seven different homes. (We move a lot.)


Two of my aunts and uncles have died from a disease.


My first kiss was in kindergarten. I still remember his name...Timothy.


When I was 12, I ran up the cell phone bill to $2,000. I haven't had a cell phone since.


I'm bi-lingual. I speak fluent Creole and English...English is my first language.


My dog's name is Pepsi.


One of my biggest fears in life is getting pregnant.


I have a huge crush on Bradley Cooper.


I am ALL FOR gay rights. They are still human beings, just like you and me.


...More coming soon.