Friday, December 16, 2011

Depression and Therapy

Image: / Ambro

Last Thursday I went to my first therapy session.

I wasn't there for long, and if you've ever been, you know that it is a quick, short session.

For this first session I was with my mom--unfortunately.

It was beyond awkward.

I never open up to my mom or tell her anything for that matter so to have her in the room made me hold back.

My therapist would ask a question and I would try to answer him only to be interrupted by my mom.

She felt it was necessary to speak for me.

To her, this was her therapy session, not mine. Which is ridiculous, I am the one who suggested it for myself.

Every time she interrupted me to say "oh, Minty's just blah...blah...blah..." I wanted to look at my therapist and say "see what I have to deal with?"

It was beyond annoying.

Everything just has to be about her, and her problems.

We all have problems, we all are struggling, it's not just you living in this f*cking 2 bedroom house.

You may be the one paying the bills and putting food on the table but we're old enough to see what's going on and WE STRUGGLE TOO.

We're young and should be enjoying our teen years but we cant! We're always trying to help out with bills, budgeting every little penny we earn, never getting to have that exciting Christmas morning feeling.

It sucks for us too!

Ugh, now that I've got that out, let's get back to the whole therapy thing.

So anyway, I was diagnosed with mild depression at this first session. My therapist doesn't recommend antidepressants for me but he thinks that just talking it out will help.

Let's hope he is right. 

This past Monday we went back for session number two. It was great.

My mom wasn't there for the session and I got to open up a lot more and tell my therapist about my insecurities and about the whole Wisconsin trip ordeal.

I haven't told anyone the story of the Wisconsin trip so it felt incredible to let it all out.

We also dissected my issue with looking weak and vulnerable and we're slowly getting to the root of my issues.

So far I'm loving therapy and I'm excited to see results.

I still struggle to open up but I'm getting there.

The thing I love is that it's like having a diary to talk to and it actually talks back.

Just what I need.

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